This is How Kiruthika Overcame Fear of Loneliness

Most of us grew up under the umbrella of my family’s love and warmth. However, there comes a time when we’ve to go out there, face the world, and live on our own and that change can be difficult. This is something, 24-year Kiruthika Jayaseelan, an MS scholar in Chemical Engineering at IIT Madras, felt too. 

A person who loves reading books, writing stories on her blog and even cooking. But she moved away from home for her Masters, there came a time when she stopped feeling her real self.

“I started feeling very lonely. I was a girl who used to share everything with my mother. I couldn’t share my daily difficulties with anyone as I wasn’t close to them.”

As Kiruthika began to miss her family, she realized that she was all by herself.  She soon started feeling gloomy and would cry for every small reason. It was evident in her behaviour which she didn’t like. 

“I wasn’t like this. I started feeling homesick without my family.”

Not only Kiruthika but also people around her began to notice changes in her within one and a half months. She remembers two of her seniors saying that she was not the person she used to be. 

“This was affecting my academics too. I was lagging behind and had to do something about it.”

It was around this time that Kiruthika received an email from YourDOST, her institute’s emotional wellness partner. Without a second thought, she decided to seek professional help to manage her loneliness. 

With sheer determination to fight loneliness and not let it affect her behaviour and academics, Kiruthika found a counselor and booked an audio counseling session with her. 

“My counselor somehow realized that I needed help and suggested we connect every week. Everything was so precise.”

With this, Kiruthika had taken the first step towards her better version. She started working closely with her counselor who helped her find the root cause of her problems. 

“I found out that I felt lonely because of my insecurities.”

With her counselor, Kiruthika felt secure. They spoke over a lot of concerns and after 3 to 4 months, they together found another root cause of her problems which was childhood trauma. Since she’d been with her family, it never surfaced and without them, it came out. 

“She gave me wonderful tips to manage my emotions even during exams.”

Out of some techniques suggested by her counselor, Kiruthika found journaling her thoughts to be extremely helpful which she does to date. 

“She asked me to do more of the things I like and not focus so much on things I don’t. I couldn’t give time to my hobbies due to my hectic schedule. So I tried to balance. Like I’d listen to music while reading.”

Due to a lack of time for things Kiruthika liked doing, she could see frustration seep into her college work too. For this, her counselor suggested making time for her hobbies whenever possible. 

“She also suggested I should be assertive while communicating and not harsh. This helped me and that’s why I’m a bold and confident girl now.”

Seeing how far Kiruthika has come, she describes her journey as once breaking down in front of her counselor to feel better. Her new confidence is so strong that it clearly reflected in her behaviour. She remembers one of my professors saying how she looked underconfident when she’d joined college and how confident she looks now after 3-4 months. 

“He said Kiruthika, you look more confident day by day and it’s nice to see you grow.” 

Given the stigma attached to counseling, Kiruthika initially had no idea how it worked. It was only after she had the first conversation that she saw the benefit. 

“Once my call with the counselor got disconnected and the team called back immediately. YourDOST is a wonderful platform.”

While expressing her gratitude towards Daisy, Kiruthika calls her life’s game changer. She’s progressed enormously because of her counselor and has come really far. So far that today she’s a true warrior and encourages everyone to seek help whenever necessary. 

“It’s not bad to take external help. To realize that you need external help is a big thing. If you do, go for it. In the end, it’s you who will get better.”

Her improvement has been like a linear graph and she’s a solid 4 on a 1 to 5 scale of

Kiruthika’s Warrior Tips:
1. You may not even know if you need help. The expert you talk to will help you know more about yourself.
2.The best part about therapy is realizing my worth.