How I Conquered Self-Doubt & Set Myself Up For Success

“Tell the story of the mountain you climbed. 

Your words could be a page in someone else’s survival guide”

-Unknown

Ankita Markan’s story is bound to add more than a few pages to your survival guide.

Ankita, 20, from Chandigarh is a very pleasant, personable and smiling individual, who also happens to be a star basketball athlete. She’s a 3rd year B.Com Honours student at the prestigious Shri Ram College of Commerce, Delhi University. She’s a part of the college’s Korfball and Netball teams, besides being the Captain of their Basketball team.

An athlete, a team captain, a student at one of India’s topmost colleges, it appears that Ankita has accomplished it all, and yet she found herself experiencing a crisis until a few months back.

When she first approached YourDOST in Nov. 2019, Ankita was quite unsure about what to expect. To understand why, she takes us a few years into her past.

When I was in school, we had a career counselor administer a career assessment to all students. Rather than clearing up things for me, it only confused me further. No follow up one-on-one sessions to further explore the assessment results were organised either

Ankita had been very open to and interested in personal counseling upto this point. However this experience made her sceptical of the efficacy of counseling

Post this, life went on as usual, and eventually, Ankita joined SRCC in 2017. Besides shining in college-level sports, Ankita also distinguished herself in prestigious competitions like the National Management Olympiad 2019 where she was a finalist and the top performer of the HR department.

But Ankita wasn’t doing so well emotionally. She was full of self-doubt and would often get anxious from worrying about her future.

I would frequently find myself in crisis mode with respect to my academics and career

Yet, she managed to cope on her own for over 2 years. But her anxiety took a turn for the worse around the time she was supposed to write the CAT

I was preparing for CAT and the exam date was fast approaching. I just kept asking myself – what if I fail? It was then that I randomly decided to meet a counselor and booked an appointment with Aditya

YourDOST Expert, Mr. Aditya Sisodia, is an accomplished career counselor and life coach with over 10 years of experience in the field. Ankita distinctly remembers the precise day she met with him.

It was 22nd Nov 2019. I doubted that this would be of any help, but I went nonetheless as I was quite distressed at the time

As Ankita slowly opened up, Aditya noticed that her lack of self-esteem and confidence particularly stood out. As he himself puts it-

She was constantly comparing herself with her peers. Despite all her accomplishments, she felt that she wasn’t as good as them

First things first, the immediate issue was Ankita’s fear of the CAT. She was having second thoughts about writing the exam. She felt that she was unable to balance her preparation, academics and sports well. Together, Aditya and she explored the possible consequences of her not doing well in CAT.

The experience was eye-opening for Ankita. 

Turns out I already had all the solutions to my issues, buried somewhere in my heart. Aditya helped me bring them to the surface. He would ask me various questions in response to my worries, and the solutions revealed themselves in the form of my replies to them

Ankita came out of the session feeling lighter, calmer and more confident about the exam and eventually scored an excellent percentile. But there were still some wrinkles that needed ironing out, particularly with respect to her confidence and self-esteem.

Over subsequent sessions, Ankita further explored her fears and worries. She was very confused if she should even be pursuing an MBA at all.

Aditya encouraged her to think of all her accomplishments and take pride in them, instead of comparing herself with her peers, whenever self-doubt crept in. Together, they discussed this, which helped Ankita clear her confusion.

He helped me learn how to network using LinkedIn, and also helped me prepare for my job interviews. All in all, with his expert guidance, I was able to feel much calmer, and better prepared

Ankita is much more confident now. She still connects with Aditya every once in a while, but all in all, she has become her own best support. She urges others, who might be in the same boat as her, to resist the stigma and actively seek help.

People should use counseling services more often. Counseling is so useful and helps you gain tremendous clarity about all the options that might be available to you

It’s not easy opening up about seeking professional help in a country like ours. Individuals like Ankita help us fight the stigma of seeking help head-on, and the inspiration they provide is invaluable.

If you too are looking for better clarity in your life, please know that we’re here for you. Talk to a YourDOST Expert today, for personalized guidance.

Many more such #YDWarriors decided to share their stories with us to inspire others. If you have also gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, share your contact details and we shall get in touch with you. Click here to share your details.

Ankita’s Warrior Tips:
1. Be proud of your past accomplishments
2. Don’t compare yourself with your peers if it increases your self-doubt
3. Seek help when things are getting too difficult for you to manage on your own