Why Should You Use Humor to Manage Conflicts

In our previous post we have talked how and why we should change our mental lenses to see the lighter side of life. In this post we look at  how humour and laughter can be used effectievly to manage conflicts, and spread the warmth and love

I didn’t know how powerful a tool humor could be till the day I accidentally discovered it. I remember I was 16 years or so, and as most teenagers, I too was a rebellious kid. My careless attitude would get on my mom’s nerves leading to a huge fight, which at times dragged for a day or two, but the yelling just wouldn’t end. For me, it felt like she hated me and picked on every move I made. It had become a routine and as much as she hated it, I hated it too.

Humor is no magic but is a way to approach the situation, a way that helps us be in the moment, off guarded and spontaneous.

• Humor should be used in a playful manner, not as an act of mocking the other person. The aim of this is not to attack the person but to hit the conflict and neutralize it. Therefore saying hurtful things that are not appreciated but the other should be avoided.

• Do not use humor as a cover for ones feelings. Its good to let the conflict not get into the sanity of the relationship but using it as a tool to avoid emotions like anger, fear, pain might be dangerous and, in turn, might just distance the people involved. For example, Jack might not be committed to one person but jokes around with everybody for he fears intimacy and the feeling of being vulnerable.

To sum it up: humor has its own positives and negatives. It makes us feel at peace both physically and mentally hence when used in the right manner and direction can help resolve difficult situations in life.